Author Topic: Humility is Connected to Patience.  (Read 8389 times)

icy

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Humility is Connected to Patience.
« on: January 27, 2013, 03:57:21 PM »
I think that there is a very close connection between humility and patience. Humility involves having the capacity to take a more confrontational stance, having the capacity to retaliate if you wish, yet deliberately deciding not to do so. That is what I would call genuine humility. I think that true tolerance or patience has a component or element of self-discipline and restraint--the realization that you could have acted otherwise, you could have adopted a more aggressive approach, but decided not to do so. On the other hand, being forced to adopt a certain passive response out of a feeling of helplessness or incapacitation--that I wouldn't call genuine humility. That may be a kind of meekness, but it isn't genuine tolerance.
Now when we talk about how we should develop tolerance towards those who harm us, we should not misunderstand this to mean that we should just meekly accept whatever is done against us. [Laughs] Rather, if necessary, the best, the wisest course, might be to simply run away--run miles away!

Sometimes, you may encounter situations that require strong countermeasures. I believe, however, that you can take a strong stand and even take strong countermeasures out of a feeling of compassion, or a sense of concern for the other, rather than out of anger. One of the reasons why there is a need to adopt a very strong countermeasure against someone is that if you let it pass--whatever the harm or the crime that is being perpetrated against you--then there is a danger of that person's habituating in a very negative way, which, in reality, will cause that individual's own downfall and is very destructive in the long run for the individual himself or herself. Therefore a strong countermeasure is necessary, but with this thought in mind, you can do it out of compassion and concern for that individual.

--from The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for Living by His Holiness the Dalai Lama

apprenticehealer

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Re: Humility is Connected to Patience.
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2013, 09:36:52 AM »
The definition of humility is the quality of being humble, to be modest, respectful and unassertive.

Humility is also define in The Eight Verses Of Thought Transformation by Geshe Langri Tanga Dorge Senge, in one of the following verse:-

Whenever I associate with anyone,
May I view myself as least of all,
And, from the depths of my heart,
May I cherish others as supreme!

The definition of patience is the ability to accept suffering without becoming angry or upset, to have equanimity, understanding, tolerance.

Patience as defined in The Eight Verses Of Thought Transformation :-

May I accept unjust loss
Such as others abusing me,
Or slandering me out of jealousy,
and may i offer the victory to others!

Humility and Patience go hand in hand with each other, but also compassion, loving kindness, forgiveness - virtues all taught by the Buddha. I do agree with Icy that sometimes, other people will misunderstand us that we are weak and meek and they will perpetuate the bullying and the situation can turn ugly . if not violent. However if we are react on this in an equally aggressive manner, then we are no better than the bullies themselves. We in turn create a huge negative 'ball' that keeps growing bigger and bigger between both of us.

In such times, we just have to bear in mind Buddha's teachings and be detached from the situation, and not allow it to affect us.

Tenzin K

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Re: Humility is Connected to Patience.
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2013, 03:00:45 PM »
The Buddha often praised his followers who possessed the quality of being “easy to admonish”. What does that mean? It means that some people take instruction more easily than others, and the ones who are most likely to make spiritual progress are those who have the humility to see that there’s a lot they don’t yet know. It’s worth considering where we stand on this scale.

How sensitive are we to being told what to do by others? Whether it’s a direct order, a strong suggestion, or a forceful request, many of us instinctively rebel when we feel subordinated. Even when it’s our manager telling us what to do, the ego often chafes at being directed. In the worst case, it’s a teacher we’ve sought out and asked for instruction, and yet, when instructed we still somehow think that we know better, that the teacher really doesn’t know any more than we do. Usually this is because the instruction includes something unpleasant or difficult for us. On the whole, whenever we’re asked to position ourselves as secondary in any way, the ego flares.

In this situation, the perfection we can bring to mind is khanti or patient endurance. If we are without humility, we can’t see that our suffering originates in our own misunderstandings of how things are, and progress becomes difficult. With patient endurance, we gradually come to see that the things that we cling to (the things that upset us) are what bind us to painful states.

Even something as wonderful as a long, happy, and satisfying partnership contains the seeds of enormous suffering – along with the obvious benefits. The arrogance is in thinking that, for us anyway, there is a free ride, that we can be attached to people or things without any corresponding pain.

Interestingly, there is only one sort of pleasure we can have that doesn’t have a corresponding painful side; that is, the feeling of release brought about by letting go of whatever it is we’re clinging to.

pgdharma

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Re: Humility is Connected to Patience.
« Reply #3 on: January 31, 2013, 02:54:13 PM »
Patience and humility are closely connected because even though we can retaliate and take a more confrontational stance or be aggressive but we decided not to do so. Having this realization requires a lot of self discipline and patience. Also a humble person generally is patient because he does not put his interests before those of others.

The cultivation of humility and patience is not easy but through practice it will become natural in due course. When practicing, remember the first two factors of the noble eightfold path: right view and right intention.
Right view is having “no view” that would allow us to feel superior and right intention is the intention to expunge pride, arrogance, conceit and egotism.

fruven

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Re: Humility is Connected to Patience.
« Reply #4 on: February 01, 2013, 03:17:56 AM »
When humility and patience are hard to practice it is a sign that we are not used to it and haven't practice this virtue enough.

When is it enough?

I think when we think it is enough than we are not practicing enough. When we think it is hard to practice than we are not practicing enough. If we can observe these kind of signs, at some level, we are able to identify and thus make progress because we have some form of control to consciously decide, rejoice! :) Patience is part of every action we are doing regardless whatever we are doing even a thief is patient to increase his chances of stealing something. Therefore we must definitely check our motivations when we are doing something. Think back of the 8 worldly concerns and then perhaps slowly but surely your patience will grow.

Rihanna

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Re: Humility is Connected to Patience.
« Reply #5 on: February 03, 2013, 04:37:39 AM »
The two most powerful warriors to success are patience and humility. The practice of patience toward one another, the overlooking of one another's defects, and the bearing of one another's burdens is the most elementary condition of all human and social activity in the family, in the professions, and in society.

Humility is the foundation of all the other virtues hence, True humility occurs when you see yourself as the servant to all, not just to a select few.

"To lose patience is to lose the battle."--
Mahatma Gandhi

Who else can better say this with true conviction but from Mahatma Gandhi, the preeminent leader of Indian nationalism in British-ruled India, who patiently dedicated 33 years of his life to liberate his country from the British without a shed of blood.

 'A life of service must be one of humility. He, who would sacrifice his life for others, has hardly time to reserve for himself a place in the sun.' -- Mahatma Gandhi 



RedLantern

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Re: Humility is Connected to Patience.
« Reply #6 on: February 03, 2013, 12:59:48 PM »
The traits of patience and humility are hallmarks of a peaceful and happy life.Patience allows us to exercise
empathy and compassion; humility helps us recognize our place in the rythmn of life.The traits are often attributed to religious and/or spiritual influence,but can be achieved regardless of your beliefs about a higher power.Remember that what happens within is reflected outwards;directing patience and humility towards ourselves and will help us direct it towards others.
It makes us human which means that we must love one another and love means to be humble and not think ourselves superior to anyone,patient,as without it we will hurt others.

buddhalovely

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Re: Humility is Connected to Patience.
« Reply #7 on: February 06, 2013, 01:41:39 PM »
That we should be humble is about as obvious as that we should be loving and patient. But as I said before, we have to state the obvious, because we do not consistently practice the obvious as we ought.

"love, patience, meekness"  Many people fail to be loving and patient because they are not meek and lowly. You might say, “Well Mr Graham, I'm having trouble being loving and compassionate, I'm having trouble being patient, and now you want to pile another obligation upon me to be meek and humble. I cannot carry all that load.” No, you don't understand. If a child were having trouble carrying a carton of milk and a loaf of bread, would it be fair to give them something more to carry? Yes, it would, if it were a bag to put the milk and bread in, and make them easier to carry. Think of humility as a carry bag for love and patience, not as an extra burden. See? Now perhaps patience and love will be possible for you.