Thank you all for so kindly and generously sharing your thoughts on this particular subject.
Death has always been the most challenging and thorny subject for me. Almost to the point that it is, to this day, a real obstacle to my personal Dharma practice.
Because of death, and the fear of losing the ones I love at death, I had refused to get too close to anyone - even my own Guru. Hence, there is this safe respectful distance. Then when the separation comes at death, I would not be so devastated. This was how I used to think.
Now, with the understanding of Dharma and through constant practice, I am learning to be less afraid of truly caring for all around me - especially my Guru.
At the heart of Dharma is Bodhichitta - without Bodhichitta, we cannot truly exchange ourselves for others. Hence, how can we ever let go of our own self-cherishing?
Here, I would like to share a paragraph from Lama Zopa's Advice on How to Prepare for and Not Be Afraid of Death. It has helped me a great deal in my own practice. Hope it is useful to everyone here too.
"The purpose of my life is not only my own happiness, not only solving my own problems. The goal of my life is to free others from suffering and to cause all the happiness - temporal and ultimate - to benefit others.
I'm just one living being. My importance is nothing. How much I suffer or how much happiness I achieve is nothing. There are numberless other living beings who want happiness, who don't want suffering and who need my help. Every one of them is the source of all my past, present and future happiness. Each of them is the most precious one in my life.
How incredibly fortunate I am that I can let go of my self - from which all problems and all the undesirable things come - and instead cherish others and experience their death and all their problems for them. I can let them have all the temporal and ultimate happiness."